ARGHHHH!!!~~~ i'm torn. i'm lost. in dis whole mess

i nv noe dat the ppl ard mi are so complicated...

i was like being manipulated u noe...

all abt the movie tingy again.

i told karen I DUN WAN TO WATCH CHARLIE le.

not bcos jayton dey all watching...

but is bcos jieting wana watch movie wid mi..

so i dun intend to catch two movies...

sumore v rush... so ytd thru the phone............

i suggests another movie wid jieting.

and i'm determined to tell karen dat i'm not watching.

so i called karen aft saying bye to jieting...

i asked her if she wana watch the movie norts..

she said yes, den i ask her wat time and wat abt j they all

she said duno duno duno...

maybe i was too impatient. but i simply dun liek it.

dun liek it whn others said duno to mi.

does dat mean dat i hv to decide on my own?

den wat if they dun liek my decision...

i'm rli v confused and abit angry at her too.

so i put down the fone and i tot it over on my own..

i was actually worrying fer my mei too..

cos i'm not exactly sure if sum1 is lking aft her..

therefore i can't promise a 'two-movies day'

abt dis issue, i didnt tell anione abt it...

cos i see no pt in telling bahx..

ppl will oni start saying my mum/mei fer restricting mi

not giving mi freedom etc etc...

although i hate it sumtimes...

but it do affects mi whn u said dat of my family...

feeling rather uneasy lorhs...

but i nv eva tell anione abt dis... haiz.

going back to ytd nite, i rmb sms-ing karen.

telling her dat i dun wan to watch le..

she asked 'why?'

dats expected of her... haiz.

so i said i wanted to catch a movie wid jieting and chilli initially..

den now tings became so complicated...

so i said I'M NOT JOINING DEM LE...

sumore i'm not the one calling so mani ppl lorhs..

sumtimes i rli dun liek so mani ppl to go out...

clashes are bound to happen...

i rli hate it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! arghhh...

mi calling karen and kitty 2 go in the first place is bcos..

they wanted to watch too..

den i tot jieting dun mind dem going...

since waiyee wanted to go b4 dat.

in the end wai changed her mind...

so tings gt out of place then...

haiz... i rli felt so so so angry and watsoever.

todae in the morning karen shuns mi...

den i sensed it oredi...

knowing dat it must be sth to do wid the movie.

she kept asking mi wat i told jieting...

IS SHE TRYING TO TINK DAT I'M LYING TO HER?!

i'm pissed u noe... it's as if the world is going against mi_____

i rli duno why... but todae i must say wat i felt all along.

karen to mi, is a fren. i tot we could be v v v gd frens..

sth like mi ym sharon and renee...

budden mani mani tings happen...

which i dun wish to rake it up..

and she is someone dat couldnt make mi open up.

i will still hide sum secrets frm her..

and if i'm unsatisfied wid sumthings, i wun tell her.

i dun quite uds our r/s...

and now i gtg... cos i hv to fake in front of dem

watch my fav movie.... haiz.

if i dun go, i dun dare to tink of anithing....

dat they might tink of mi.